We once thought that IQ was the magic bullet for success in life. However, this is no longer considered to be true. Emotional Intelligence (EQ) seems to be the most important factor determining how successful someone will become.
EQ and IQ
According to the work of Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence contributes an 80% to success in life. On the other hand, IQ provides the rest 20%. That is, EQ is 5 or 6 times more important than IQ. None of them is considered fixed and permanent. But Emotional Intelligence has the greater margins for growth. In other words, EQ can be trained. Let’s check the levels of our own EQ and see how we can improve it!
Emotional Intelligence Exercise: Check your EQ
Below, there is a list of qualities, which are common in people with high EQ. Check which of those you possess and mark them from 1-10.
- [ ] Self control and self discipline
- [ ] Impulse control
- [ ] Openness, adaptation and embracing change
- [ ] Ability to perform under conditions of pressure
- [ ] Good understanding of own emotions
- [ ] Good understanding of the emotions of others
- [ ] Awareness of strengths and weaknesses
- [ ] Optimism
- [ ] Self confidence
- [ ] Good communication skills
- [ ] Acceptance of criticism by other people
- [ ] Disagree without causing tension
- [ ] Offer constructive criticism
- [ ] Initiative taking
- [ ] Cultivate trust in relationships
- [ ] Self motivation in order to reach goals
- [ ] Ability to lead and influence
- [ ] Resist prejudice
- [ ] Decisiveness
- [ ] Persuasion
- [ ] Patience
- [ ] Persistence
- [ ] Curiosity
- [ ] Ability to inspire others
- [ ] Cooperate without competing
- [ ] Teamwork
- [ ] Maintain control in crisis situations
- [ ] Control impatience
- [ ] Ability to focus
- [ ] Acceptance of defeat and failure
- [ ] Listen before talking
- [ ] Acceptance of our weaknesses
- [ ] Personal and work ethics
- [ ] Ability to neutralize toxic people
- [ ] Give without expecting
- [ ] Know when and feeling comfortable saying no
- [ ] Ability to slow down, disconnect and relax
- [ ] Quick recovery after a mistake or failure
- [ ] Robust emotional vocabulary
- [ ] Resist perfectionism
I have vs I want
Next, identify which skills you already have and which ones you want. Make a note of those that you score high and those you score low. Then, write them down in two separate columns, as shown in the following table:
I have enough
|I want to improve|
Lock the target
Finally, let’s lock the target. Make a note of those which seem particularly appealing to you. That is, the ones you would like to see in your new version. You will also need to be clear about why you want to have them. In addition, think about the benefit of having each of them. If you know people who already have these qualities, take them as role models.
Let this new realization linger in your mind for the days to come. As long as you keep it in your radar, you will surely find the way to upgrade yourself.
Also, see the article: Gratitude Jar: Empower your gratitude muscles!
🤿 For more information, visit the blog of Daniel Goleman, author of “EQ: Why it can matter more than IQ”.